Some common situations where parents/guardians consider sending their child/ward for Counselling in school: 1) My child/ward is not talking to me or is talking lesser to me. 2) My child/ward is defiant / rude towards me. 3) My child's/ward's academic performance has deteroriated or is not up to expectations. 4) My child/ward is using his electronic devices (e.g. handphone, Chromebook) too much. He is always glued to it and not studying or not being involved in other aspects of his life. 5) My child/ward is accessing undesirable content online. Should I send my child/ward for Counselling in school? What can I do?
During Secondary School, our students face many changes/transitions. Examples include transiting from Primary to Secondary School (e.g. more subjects, new teachers, new environment, new friends etc), transiting from Lower Secondary to Upper Secondary (e.g. new subjects, new teachers, new classmates, more leadership and CCA opportunities and hence heavier school schedule etc) and transiting from a child to a young adult (e.g. puberty and adolescence, self identity etc) which all affect our students in areas such as self-concept, self-worth, self-control, interests and motivation. Therefore there definitely would be changes to our students' behaviour, interactions with others, performance etc which can be worrying. While Counselling in school is an option for your child/ward, we strongly encourage that you try the following first (not a comprehensive list) so as to also strengthen your understanding and relationship with your child/ward: 1) Dedicate fixed day(s) and time per week for bonding / interaction with your child/ward as a family or with him alone, through meals, movies, activities without the use of electronic devices from all partieis. This will allow you to hear your child's/ward's thoughts / concerns, for building of stronger relationship for him to know he can turn to you if he needs. 2) Work out clear boundaries and expectations and consequences with your child/ward and follow-through with them consistently. Routines, consistency, firrmness are important to help our students in developing self-control. Examples: - Certain language, words, actions are not allowed at home and shouldn't be used by parents/guardians too, to set an example and model for the child/ward. - Only use electronic devices from 6am to 10pm daily and at 10pm, all electronic devices are handed over to parents/guardians so child/ward can sleep or study without distractions. Timing can be adjusted accordingly and followed closely between parents/guardians and child/ward. - Only use Chromebook in open areas instead of in child's/ward's room where nobody can see what he is accessing online - Set academic expectations (e.g. 5 subjects to score B3 and above for WA) and consequences (e.g. no electronic device would be given to child/ward for 1 week at all) If after trying the above-mentioned and/or other methods consistently for a period of time and there is no improvement, please do speak to your child's/ward's Form Teachers who would approach our School Counsellors.
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